Hate: A Love Story
by Ruffling-Feathers
Summary: I loved her & She shattered my heart. I loved him & he left me without a goodbye.
1. Ana

"So are you excited about your trip back home?" Jose asks handing Ana her tea.

"No."

"Wow, like that? Why?"

"Home holds to many bad memories for me." Ana explains as they walk to her couch for their movie night.

"But what about the good ones, think about those."

"The bad outweighs the good." Ana answers and presses play silencing Jose and his questions. Three months ago she bumped in to Elliot Grey, it had been almost 10 years since the last time they saw each other. Back when she was still living in Seattle, happy and carefree, before everything changed. He had been a good friend to her so when he asked Ana to a quick lunch she instantly agreed. Sitting in a little café for hours they talked and laughed like old times. Ana didn't realize how much she had missed him so when he invited her to his engagement party Ana quickly agreed. Now after thinking about it, she wished she hadn't. Shaking her head of her thoughts Ana tried to focus on the movie and relax.

* * *

><p>"The deadline for your column was moved to 12:30p leaving you two hours to finish it and place it in Jack's hands." Hannah, her assistant, kindly informs.<p>

"What, Why? This will be the third lunch I'll be working through." Ana huffs in annoyance waiting for the laptop to power up.

"Sorry, I'm only the messenger and I ordered you you're favorite so chop-chop." She orders smiling sweetly.

"If you weren't my best friend I would've fired your ass already." Blowing Ana a kiss she leaves as Ana gathers her notes from and sits down to finish the rest of the article but first she sends an email Sharon about the other article, the one no one knows its written by sweet little Ana. At first it started as an online for subscribers only but with the reception it received Sharon decided to include it in the magazine for the public. This recent article will sure give her a heart attack.

At noon Hannah brings in lunch as Ana is ready to head to Jack's office. He's been at Cosmo for six months after Elizabeth abruptly left and none of the female employees like him. He's a bit of a creeper. His office door is open and as if he could sense Ana he looks up and motions her in.

"Anastasia, do you have what I need?"

"Yes, here it is." She hands him the flash drive, his fingers brushing slightly against hers. Shivers run down her spine but not the good kind.

"You never disappoint me Anastasia." After a few awkward moments she quickly leaves heading back to the safety of her floor; walking in to her office Jose waits helping himself to her lunch.

"I wondered where you were." He greets with a hug.

"I had to turn in my work to creeper Jack." Slipping off her heels she tucks into the meal.

"So since you obviously need a break how about we take a trip to Decadence tonight and release some tension." His sly smile makes his dimples more pronounce a tale-tell sign he has something up his sleeve.

"Sure, I could use a night out. Have you invited Liam?"

"Already have and he's down for tonight, apparently that little tart is giving him the runaround again. I don't know why he doesn't just tell her to fuck off and find himself someone else."

"She's at it again? Looks like I need to have a talk with him then."

"Please do, hearing him bitch about it is getting on my nerves." Jose scowls and Ana giggles at his clear frustration with Liam. When Ana and her family first moved to London, Liam was the first friend she made. He lived in the same building and his mom helped them get situated with their new life here. Aside from Jose, Liam is the only other man who knows her completely. Jose used to come in everyday to the café Ana worked at while she went to school, later she found out he was close friends with Liam and one night Ana and Jose hooked up, that was the night sweet little Ana discovered the other side to her and with Jose being the owner of Club Decadence only helped her further explore that side.


	2. Christian

This week has been a total fucking disaster. First, the company Christian was going after was taking from under him by some fucker based in California. Then some idiot crashed GEH servers trying to hack into it and lastly the Grey matriarch somehow managed to convince Christian to attend Elliot's engagement party. The only thing good going so far is that Leila will be waiting for him later. With how tense Christian is the poor girl isn't going to be able to walk come Monday. With one swing of his door, Christian's day went from bad to worse as Elena walks in with Andrea behind her.

"I'm sorry sir but she wouldn't listen." Andrea states glaring icily at Elena.

"It's fine Andrea." Christian sighs rubbing his temple, the beginnings of a headache starting. Andrea is the only person who has the balls to make it known her great dislike for Elena. Everyone else is scared shitless of the temperamental CEO and scurrie away but not Andrea. That's one of the reasons she's been here at GEH since the beginning. Only the strong survive here.

"My dear I do believe you need to have a word with her, she tried to tell me you didn't want to see me." Elena says planting herself in one of the chairs.

"That's because I told her too. I'm not in the mood to deal with you or your shit so just get to the point and get out."

"Testy, testy. Leila not doing her job correctly? You know I could help you with that."

"Oh cut the crap, what do you want?" His temper rapidly rising. Since Christian was 19, Elena has tried and failed to get into his pants and its killing her knowing that will never happen. The dominant has a type: brunette with big blue eyes just like _**hers.**_

"I've run into some problems with Esclava, I've sent you a few emails about it but you haven't responded so I felt I need to speak to you in person."

"Yes I saw your emails but I'm not helping you. I've told you many times never to bother me about your business. Its your problem so deal with it yourself." She scowls, clearly that response wasn't what she wanted to hear.

"I helped you when you needed it or did you forget." She starts spewing the same tune when Christian gives her an answer she doesn't like.

"You did and when I had the means I paid you back with interest therefore voiding any debt I had to you and I agreed to you conditions. I don't owe you a damn thing Elena." She was the one who lent the money his parents refused when the young Grey dropped out of Harvard. They lectured on about ruining his life but it was a clean deal with Elena, she somehow had discovered his dabbling in BDSM and tried to use that to her advantage but it didn't go as planned. She wanted him to sub for her but the tables were turned but sex was written out of the contract. She had no choice but to agree so she subbed for two years, which is how long it took for Christian to pay her back, it was a slow start getting GEH off the ground but when he did and didn't need her money she was swiftly kicked to the curb. Since then she's tried to find ways to be a part of his life like offering to find subs and meet with them but that would be giving her some sort of control which for Christian, can't happen.

"Still I helped you when you needed it and now I need help, it's the friendly thing to do."

"We're not friends Elena, we never were to begin with. Look I have a lot to deal with and I don't have the time to also deal with your shit and I'm running late for a meeting so if you could leave I will greatly appreciate that." He lies giving her a don't push it look, she reluctantly gets up and leaves, huffing and puffing all the way. Once she's out everything gets powered down and Christian leaves through the private elevator.

The day starts turning around when Leila is in the foyer, head down and anticipating his orders. For the next two days it wont be Leila's face he's seeing, it will be _**hers. **_Punishing her for her betrayal.


	3. Familiar Faces

**1 Week Later…**

Fixing her hair for the millionth time Ana had no choice but to head to the hotel ball room since she couldn't find a plausible excuse to give Elliot for missing the party. Jose and Liam were flying in tomorrow so she would be in this alone. From the liquor cabinet she grabbed a bottle of tequila and poured a shot for courage. As the dark liquid warmed her throat she grabbed her clutch and left the comfort of her room.

With deep breaths she stepped into the cream decorated room scanning for any familiar face. She was ready to bolt when out of no where a petite raven haired girl squealed and hugged her.

"Oh my god! I can't believe its you!" Mia hugged her tightly squeezing all the air out of Ana.

"Mia let her go." Scolded Elliot, Ana mouthed a thank you to him as she hugged him. "I was wondering if I needed to send a search party for you. Here I think you need this." Elliot said and handed her a flute of champagne from one of the passing servers. Grateful she accepted and took a drink praying her nerves would calm. It had been years since she seen any of these people.

"Yes well I made it. It's very good to see you Mia; you've turned into a lovely lady." Mia blushed at the compliment.

"Thank you, so have you. Are you in Seattle for good?" Before Ana could answer a striking blonde came next to Elliot's side.

"Ana, I'd like you to meet the future Mrs. Elliot Grey." He said proudly looking at his fiancé with adoration.

"Hi, Elliot's said so much about you; it's so good to finally meet you." Kate replied pulling Ana into a warm hug.

"I hope they were good and congrats, I know Lelliot can be a handful." The old childhood nickname makes Elliot cringe, Mia laugh and leaves Kate confused.

"Lelliot?" Kate wonders.

"Mia couldn't pronounce my name correctly when she was younger. She called me Lelliot and it stuck. I haven't been called that in years." Elliot explains to Kate. More guests trickle in claiming the couple to their duties and leaving Mia and Ana alone. Seeing her nervous state Mia ushers them to a table away from the crowd.

"So how have you been Ana?" The girls start chatting and slowly Ana relaxes and begins to enjoy the party, snacking on hors d'oeuvres and sipping champagne.

Never noticing that on the opposite side of the room Christian was watching.

* * *

><p>There were a million other places where Christian would rather be than at this party. Grace had made sure Christian attended by sending Carrick to pick him up. He couldn't tell his mother that he didn't want to see Elliot and how happy he was, how Elliot had ruined Christian's chance at his own happiness 10 years ago. But it wasn't just Elliot alone who had ruined it; Anastasia Steele had a part in that.<p>

"Would it be so hard to look like you're actually enjoying being here?" Grace scolded making Christian roll his eyes.

"Why mother I am happy." Christian stated flashing her with the biggest fake smile he could muster. Grace, clearly not amused, sighed and left her son to attend other guests.

Christian was in mid conversation with an overly touchy redhead when his gaze fell on her. Sitting with his younger sister on the opposite side of the room. It had been 10 years since Christian last saw Ana and she was just as beautiful. Feelings that he banished years ago started stirring within but were quickly stomped on by the anger that outweighed them. The old tattered picture he had didn't do the Ana before him any justice; she had blossomed into a beautiful flower, a deceitful flower.

Not wanting to be in the presence of the two traitors Christian fled the room knocking down an innocent bystander. The commotion causing Ana to turn around, her gaze landing on stormy gray pissed off eyes.


	4. So many Questions

The moment Ana laid eyes on Christian, feelings she had thought were tucked away resurfaced but the look in his eyes made them run and hide. She had never seen such angry eyes before and the fact they were directed at her, from the one person she truly once loved confused her. She didn't understand why Christian would be angry at her, it should be the other way around with how things were left 10 years ago.

Christian was livid. At the idiot waiter for being in the way. At his mother for forcing him to attend this party. At the feelings he had locked away that were creeping to the surface. But mostly he was livid at the blue eyed woman staring at him. He had so much he wanted to shout at her, so much anger, that he kept bottle in, wanted to be released at her and at Elliot who had made his appearance next to her table. Seeing them side by side made the blood boil and without giving a fuck if he took out another idiot waiter he stormed out.

Only to realize he didn't have a car. He had gotten a ride and was shit out of luck.

* * *

><p>Despite the hiccup of Christian making a scene, the party went off without a hitch and for the first time Ana truly enjoyed herself. But the way Christian acted was in the back of her mind and it didn't help when Mia mentioned the family's lack of relationship with him.<p>

"Nobody knows why Christian suddenly hated Elliot, Elliot tried talking to him once but Christian told him he should know and slammed the door in his face. The only reason he was here was because mother made him." Mia explained to Ana as they walked to the elevator.

"Was this recent? I remember Christian idolized Elliot."

"No, its been almost 10 years, this sudden change happened when Christian was leaving for Harvard." Ana had a sudden thought if that was the reason for Christian's sudden departure and the lack of goodbye. Mia hugged Ana goodbye leaving her to ponder this new information, her mind was swimming with so many questions it was a surprise she managed to fall asleep.

* * *

><p>The following day Ana met her two friends at the airport and after they dropped off their luggage in her hotel room the three friends went out to lunch at a small Italian restaurant Ray used to take his family when they lived in Seattle.<p>

"So Ana how was the party yesterday." Liam asked after they were done ordering.

"Its was fun actually." Ana decided on a short answer but she knew better. Both Liam & Jose knew about her history with Christian and were ready to call bullshit when Ana continued. "After Christian made a small scene. I didn't know he was there until he knocked down a poor waiter, when we made eye contact there was so much anger in his eyes and it was directed at me." Ana murmured the last part since she was still confused as to why.

"Angry? What could you have done? He was the one who left you and didn't answer or return any of your calls or letters." Jose chimed in while nibbling on a bread stick.

"I don't know. It gets confusing after I was told that Christian now hates Elliot."

"Well, that's what happens when you're gone for 10 years." Liam said getting a kick from Jose. "What its true. People change, shit happens." He shrugged as he eyed a perky blond sitting at the bar.

"As insensitive as that was, Liam does have a point. Are you going to try and talk to him? Get some answers from him?"

"I don't know." Ana sighed but she knew she had to if she wanted to put her mind at ease.

Plus she had something that Christian had the right and needed to know about.

* * *

><p><strong>I made a FB page for this. Link is in my bio. Laters.<strong>


	5. Hung over Memories

Taylor was puzzled as to why his boss was so furious when he picked him up from the party last night. In the five years he worked for Grey he had never seen him like this and he never wanted to again. Christian stormed into his office threw shit around and called Welch for a background check. Steam started leaving his ears when Welch told him it would be a while since the file he was trying to get a hold of was sealed with codes.

Three hours later Welch was able to email Christian the files but at this point he was shit-faced after drinking all the liquor at Escala. Taylor ended up putting him to bed while poor Gail cleaned the wreck that was his office.

* * *

><p>Gail and Taylor were enjoying their boss' miserable state since Christian had the worst hangover of life. "Serves him right." Gail mumbled as she worked on her world famous apple pie. Christian had woken up at noon and looked like the walking dead as he headed to his office. He ended up falling back asleep when he laid his cheek on the cold desk and Gail continued to enjoyed the rare peace and quiet.<p>

Around 5 o'clock Christian woke up when Gail was checking on him, she didn't need a dead man on her hands. She handed him an Advil and juice, placed a tray of greasy food down and left the room trying to contain her laugh, Christian had papers stuck to his face from drooling!

Peeling them off his face Christian rubbed his temples trying to focus his vision and stop his office from spinning. This by far was the worst hangover he ever had. A few minutes later he was slowly chewing when he saw the file he had asked for. Ana's background check. He skimmed through her basic information that he already knew and stopped when he read that she had moved to London a few days after he left. Their address had been blacked out, most of the info regarding that had been blacked out. In the margin Welch had scribbled that he had managed to get that certain info and to check the last pages. Christian flipped to them and read carefully.

_Location: London_

_Reason: Threat against agent Raymond Steele and family._

_Length: Undetermined, until threat is eradicated. _

It didn't go into more detail as to what the threat was or where the family had moved to. He flipped back to the previous page and continued reading. Ana had graduated from Cambridge in English lit and managed to get a job at Cosmo as an editor right after graduating. Christian would be lying if he said he wasn't proud of Ana. When he flipped the next page, every other sentence was blacked out and again Welch left him a note in the margin but this time it read, _"Sorry Sir, but I wasn't able to get a hold of these. Whoever sealed them made damn sure no one could ever unseal them. I will continue to try but I make no promises." _Christian had a feeling he knew who sealed it, Raymond Steele was CIA and he terrified. He flipped through more pages but didn't get as much info as he liked since a lot of it was blacked out so he tossed the papers in a drawer and went back to his bedroom after popping another Advil. he quickly fell asleep but with dreams were plagued with memories.

"_I love you Anastasia." Christian murmured in her ear as they made love. This was his favorite thing to do with her. _

"_I love you too Christian." She replied dragging her nails up his back. This was they're three year anniversary and with Elliot's help Christian had managed to make it a special night. Elliot was able to get them a room at The Edgewater Hotel for his little brother and covered his whereabouts to their parents, Mia did the same with Ana's. _

"_I don't want to ever leave our bubble Christian. I want to stay like this forever." Ana whispered as she traced small circles on his chest after they finished making love._

"_Me too. I wish I could make time stand still. Having you in my arms is the best thing in the world." He told her wrapping his arms tightly around her. Before they went in for round two Christian made a mental note to thank Elliot_.

* * *

><p>"<em>Whats wrong Christian? You haven't said much since we left your parents house?" Christian didn't have the heart to tell her that he had gotten accepted to Harvard. He had applied at his fathers request not because he wanted to go. Ana had gotten accepted at UW and that was where Christian wanted to go. <em>

"_Nothing Ana, everything's fine." He lied and he knew she could see right through it but she didn't push. Ana knew when he was ready he would tell her and if not she knew exactly how to make him talk. When they pulled up to the small Italian bistro Christian tried to forget his woes and enjoy his limited time with Ana._

* * *

><p>"<em>I only applied because you forced me to!" Christian shouted at his father. It had been a week since he got the acceptance letter that was burning a hole in his desk from Harvard. Grace found the letter when she was putting away his laundry and she quickly showed her husband. <em>

"_Harvard is the best for you to pursue law." Carrick tried to reason with his son. Since Elliot had gone into construction, Christian was his last hope for taking over his firm. _

"_I don't want to study law, I told you that many times before. I have a right to live my life and study whatever the hell I want. I'm going the UW whether you like it or not!"_

"_You're only going there to follow that meaningless good for nothing girl." Carrick had just said the last word when Christian threw the punch knocking him down. Grabbing his car keys he fled to the one that would comfort and calm him but when he pulled up to her house his world shattered. _

_With having no where else to go he drove himself to the airport and didn't look back._


	6. What do they say about assumptions?

Christian wasn't in the mood to socialize after the mess Saturday at the party and his hang over on Sunday so he stayed at Escala until Ros threatened to drag him out by his hair on Wednesday. So when Thursday morning rolled in he had no choice but to get dressed and head to GEH.

He was only there for twenty minutes when he was ready to call Taylor to take him back to Escala but his lunch meeting had him stuck. Welch had no luck with the background check so instead he had him focus on the what Ana was doing now and how long she was planning to stay since he wanted to avoid her at all costs. It was the cowardly thing to do but it was the easiest.

Ana was having lunch with Jose when Christian walked in to the french restaurant. He hadn't seen her yet until he took his seat that had a clear view of her. Ana saw him visibly tense and frown at her while a confused expression washed across her face. She needed to get to the bottom of this and soon.

Christian couldn't believe he had to sit three tables across from Ana for an hour listening to some idiot try to sell their product. He knew he should've stayed home but he also knew Ros would do good on her threat. Every once in a while Christian would catch Ana watching him as if she was trying to figure something out. He used to adore her thinking face and would kiss the spot between her eyebrows when she started over thinking. Squeezing his fists tightly he suppressed that urge he hadn't had in years. He cursed his body for wanting her, it was like his body didn't care about the hurt that was in his heart.

* * *

><p>When Christian excused himself from his table Ana took that moment to follow him as he headed to the restrooms.<p>

"Christian." She called out but he ignored her so she tried again, "Christian I know you can hear me." He wanted to avoid this but couldn't so he turned around to see a determined Ana standing in front of him.

"What do you want Anastasia." He said in a stern voice.

"To talk. Why are you acting like this?" She asked and watched Christian's face redden with anger.

"Why? You should know damn well why I'm acting like this. I can't believe you have the nerve to think I'm going to act like nothing ever happened after seeing your betrayal." He spat and quickly turned and almost ran inside the restroom. Now more than ever Ana was determined to get to the bottom of this.

She planted herself in front of the restrooms waiting for him the exit. After taking his sweet time he figured she had left so he was shocked to see her waiting for him.

"I'm not leaving until you explain." Ana told him firmly. Christian hadn't met this new determined Ana and he did not like her. He couldn't believe she was acting as if she didn't know. He knew what he saw when he went to her house and he couldn't believe his brother would do something like that. Christian always wondered why Elliot was to quick to help him out when he wanted to do something nice for Ana, why he was always around them. Christian caught Elliot looking at Ana a little longer than usual one day but since at the time Christian was naïve he didn't think much of it. After he saw them he started analyzing everything Elliot did and it all made sense. They were seeing each other behind Christian's back.

"I don't have to explain myself to you Hester Prynne."

"Hester? What the hell Christian, stop being so fucking cryptic." Ana shouted at him earning a few glances from the workers. "Why are you acting like this? I should be the one who's pissed off at you for how you just up and left me or did you forget?"

"I only left after what I saw. You didn't warrant a goodbye after that." He answered her, frustration setting in. Ana let out a loud growl of frustration.

"So you ran like a coward then. I guess I didn't warrant a response to the letters I wrote either." She was starting to shake with anger, clearly they were getting no where and being in a public place wasn't helping.

"I never received any letters, I figured you were happy with him and that my leaving made everything better." Christian wanted to punch the wall with how angry he was and Ana looked like she wanted to strangle him. He could tell they were gaining an audience and he didn't need this plastered on the front page of Seattle Nooz, he had to cut this reunion short.

"Him? What the hell are you talking about." She replied clearly confused.

"Elliot. I saw you and Elliot together so drop the act. Was fucking one Grey brother not enough-" He didn't get to finish that sentence when Ana slapped him clear across his face.

"You stupid fucking idiot! You think I was having an affair with Elliot? You're acting like this over a fucking assumption!" Ana shouted at him, everyone in the restaurant was now watching them, some were even recording them. Ana shoved him just as Jose pulled her away and quickly left the restaurant.

Now it was Christian's turn to be the one confused.

* * *

><p><strong>This is my one and only account. The person yesterday who posted Chp 1 of my story is not me so I'd appreciate it if you guests stop harassing me. Im tired of telling you that I am not the original troll. This is my story. I wrote it and am currently writing it. I haven't harassed any one ever here yet I'm being bullied everyday for something that I NEVER did.<strong>

**If you are so damn sure that this is stolen, tell me from where. Tell me the name of the story this is stolen from. But you cant because it isn't stolen.**

**Stop wasting YOUR time, because that is what you're doing, and let me write.**

**Everyone else, thank you for reading and don't forget I'm on FB, link in my bio. Laters.**


	7. What Ifs

Ana was fuming as Jose dragged her to his car, a block away. She couldn't believe that the reason he acted so cold and cut all ties with his brother was because of an assumption. Ana knew exactly what he was talking about and it wasn't what he was thinking. If Jose hadn't taken her away Ana would have told him then and there but that would have made the situation worse. The last thing Ana wanted was her private life on full blast, it was bad enough that the incident was recorded and most likely already on you tube racking up hits.

Christian left the restaurant embarrassed, pissed and confused although he didn't know why he was confused. Ana's reaction wasn't what he expected. The more he thought about it, he could see that she truly was confused by his actions towards her. Those thoughts were pushed away though when he received a call from Welch informing him he was on you tube, Seattle Nooz and TMZ. He immediately went to damage control mode.

When Taylor pulled up to Escala Christian locked himself in his office and pulled up the video Welch had sent him. He watch closely, cursing the person who recorded it for having a shaking hand, and focusing on Ana and her body language. He saw the frustration and the confusion on her face at the harsh words he said to her. _"I guess I didn't warrant a response to the letters I wrote either." _Christian replayed this scene over and over as he tried to rack his brain about what she was talking about. He had never received any letters from her. When his family tracked him down they called constantly but he rejected the calls then letters came from them. He would read the first few lines then discarded them but none were from Ana.

The ones from Elliot met the shredder without being opened, he didn't care what that traitor had to say but not one letter was addressed from her. He figured she was happy he was gone and out of the way but somewhere deep down, Christian had a feeling, a feeling that he tried to ignore, that he had made an ass out of himself and made a colossal mistake.

* * *

><p>"Wow, you really nailed him Ana." Liam said as he watched the video for the fifth time. All the videos were taken down within minuets of being posted but Liam managed to download it to his laptop.<p>

"I didn't mean to slap him, I don't know what got into me but he just made me so fucking mad." Ana replied cringing as that scene played on the small screen. She wanted to apology to Christian but her pride kept her from doing it.

"I guess it makes some sense as to why he did what he did. He thought you betrayed him, with his brother but it doesn't justify his actions and why didn't he confront you two like a man instead of running away?" Jose asked hand Ana a bowl of mac and cheese.

"I don't know. Pride I guess. If he had only confronted us we wouldn't be here and I would still have my baby."

"You can't think about the what ifs, you'll drive yourself crazy. All you can do now is move forward and make sure shit like that doesn't happen again." Ana agreed at what Liam had said but she still couldn't stop the what ifs from playing in her head as the three friends ate silently in front of the laptop.


End file.
